Sunday, September 13, 2015

The 8 most uncool birds in Ontario

In no particular order... All of these birds have the "it" factor - something that makes them stand out among the rest; for the worst of reasons... This is a follow-up to the 10 coolest birds in Ontario (thanks JB). Be sure to check that one out if you missed it!


- has dick in it's name
- it's banding code is DICK
- it's flight call sounds like *dick!*
- Dickcissel hardly justifies the presence of all this dick 
- can hardly decide if it wants to live in Ontario at all... 

Brown-headed Cowbird

- parasitises our other birds nests
- is kinda ugly
- unnatural numbers (thanks to us) 
- not part bird, part cow as name implies

Gray Partridge

- you never see them
- they're non-native
- they aren't really surviving (hardly "established")

Canada Goose (specifically, Maxima

- they poop everywhere
- get overly aggressive at times
- they're wrecking our tundra
- they're wrecking the "cool" Canada Goose subspecies
- not to be confused with the "other" Canada Geese, which are quite fun! (Interior)

House Sparrow

- They're noisy
- non-native
- displace our cavity nesters like Tree Swallows, Bluebirds etc
- fail to attract *cool* vagrants. Just other laughables like Dickcissel and Eurasian Tree Sparrow
- aren't actually sparrows

European Starling

- they stink
- they're greasy
- they make Meadowlark calls too often
- non native
- displace our "cool/native" cavity nesting species
- they eat my grapes
- they eat too much suet (stuff's expensive)
- fail to attract any vagrants with them
- roost poop gets everywhere
- they're just.. the worst... 

Mute Swan

- their grunting makes me uncomfortable
- non-native
- killing our marsh birds
- expanding where they aren't welcome

Bicknell's Thrush

- not even a real species
- NL Gray-cheeked Thrushes are intermediate
- nearly impossible to confirm
- this photo is of a Hermit Thrush, but it doesn't make a difference...

Agree/disagree with the list? IF you disagree, what species would you add? And why?


  1. Hilarious post Brandon, I love it

  2. Awesome, reminds me of the last time I was in Whitby. Seriously, I loves me a good list, and can't disagree with any of these choices. To round out your Top 10 I'd add in Common Grackle and Ring-billed Gull.

  3. Brandon---of course I enjoyed your posting, as usual--BUT---how could you be so nasty to the Dickcissel ? I say, let's encourage this pretty guy to live in all of Ontario--not just in the SW ! He presents a yearly challenge to spot him ! Let's replace him with the Double-Crested Cormorant ! Now of what use is that creature ??? And Jacob---the Ring-Billed Gull ? No way ! Even non-birders love to watch those glistening white birds kettle in the clear blue skies--calling for attention, as well . I watch them every day of the year--well, almost !

  4. For the Mute Swan, I don't know. All the nonbirders around my place love to see swans on ponds. They are jerks though, almost drowned a canoer last year. As for roost pooping, people along the St. Lawrence absolutely detest cormorants. Seriously, its getting to the point where people are gonna start going at them like Passenger Pigeons.

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  6. Thanks for the comments all :) seems like there is some debate on DC Cormorants and RB Gulls though........