story time

A little filler while I'm away from the computer:

FLEMING ISLAND, Fla. -- When officers pulled over 23-year-old Warren Thomas Michael Saturday night, they said he was glassy-eyed, slurring his words and holding a squirrel.

A witness driving on Highway 17 in Fleming Island, Florida, spotted Michael swerving in and out of lanes and called police, according to an arrest report.

When officers caught up to Michael, they noticed him drifting over the center line, crashing into a stopped vehicle head on and continuing on his way.

Officers pulled him over moments later. But when Michael opened his window to greet officers, he wasn't holding his driver's license and registration -- he was holding a squirrel.

"Upon contact with the defendant, he immediately told me he had a squirrel eating him," the arresting officer said in a report.

When Michael pointed out the small squirrel wrapped under his shirt, officers said they smelled the strong odor of alcohol. According to the arrest report, he couldn't divide his attention between looking for the items requested by officers and answering questions about his name and birth date.

"I had the defendant secure the squirrel and then exit the vehicle," the report states.After putting Michael through several field sobriety tests, officers charged him with driving a vehicle under the influence of alcoholic beverages and/or a controlled substance.

Michael was transported to the Clay County Jail. His vehicle and squirrel were released to his girlfriend, who arrived on scene to berate him for his actions shortly after the stop, according to the arrest report.